i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Woke up this morning at my parent's house. No idea how I got here... what happened last night? Was it bad?
We using my standards or yours?
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Fuck me I smell like cheese
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
