if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
all my mom knows is what I put on facebook. So... I mean... She knows we drink a lot.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I am available for nakedness
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
Randomize
