I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
We pinky-swore to never fuck each other again.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
It's surprise blowjob week. You should be excited.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
