spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
He refused to pierce my nipples, saying they are the best he's ever seen and that blemishing them would be a crime
80% sure the drag queens carried her home
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
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