I feel like i just miscarried Jesus's baby...
two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
a girl just walked by me crying on the phone saying, "all I ever do is menstruate"
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
Saw a girl outside my apartment shotgun a bud light, then a red bull, get in her Tahoe, and drive 4 people away. Gotta love thirsty Thursday.
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Randomize
