Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
I'm super stoned watching the vatican smoke cam. Come over.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
