these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
I woke up to him trying to put his dick in my mouth. When I asked him what he was doing he said he was trying to make me stop snoring...
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
