All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
She is just riding on my slutty coat tails.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
you threw up into the pocket of your shirt. which was pretty damn polite
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize
