so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Took it for the first time last night, and i saw a giant pillsbury boy coming after me with a wrench in his hand.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
