"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
Randomize