Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
Don't play hard to get, I've seen some of the girls you've slept with.
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
if masturbating while stoned isn't called "weed whacking" then i just don't know how to live my life anymore
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Totally had a conversation drunk last night with a bisexual chick at my apartment in Spanglish too.
You're a hero.
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
Randomize
