The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
Do the right thing and go fuck yourself off a cliff
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
Randomize
