the bitch is dead man
YOUR DOG DIED?
no i meant my mom has passed out .. so i'll be over soon.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
you two started sword fighting with 3 ft tall spruce trees you pulled out of planters
A-plus on my thesis. I deserve the blowjob to end all blowjobs. And I wanna wear a crown while you do it.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
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