shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
it was a sick party until you insisted on putting on "that's how I beat shaq"
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
He put his burrito in the bag with his dildo.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
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