when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
