Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
so he tried to quietly tell me my Tampon String was hanging out in front of his family but i didn't hear him so he yelled it
My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
That rando I gave head to on the beach just endorsed me on LinkedIn for Oral Communication Skills. So there's that.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
So. Much. Porn.
Randomize
