I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
You told the waitress last night "What tip bracket do I have to be in to see your boobs"
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
Ive made peace with the fact that i will accomplish nothing except liver damage today
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Well, after emptying the contents of my stomach into a fucking rose bush, the only things moving through my digestive system are pills, coffee, and my own lip gloss. If that gives you any idea what kind of a day I'm having.
At least your nickname is not Plunge Slut and that nickname is not in a published thesis work
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
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