he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
You know that hot fire fighter I fucked yesterday? Well him and two other guys are killing the fire on my stove. Awkward.
Just saw a guy doing jumping jacks at the gym. I don't even have to create a punch line for that
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
I just wanna say I did some math and I lasted 1,052,000 more minutes than you at the bar before I got kicked out. That's 729 days. Bitch
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize