im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
then mid-sex he looked at me and said "i hope this is as good for you as it is for me" and kept going.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
She is crazy bro, she'll kiss me after eating her ass but looses her fucking mind if I double dip a french fry in "our" ketchup!
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
