Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
a pizza costume came into my possession last night. needless to say i showed up to his house wearing only the pizza, shouting "delivery" into his window.
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
COCAINE IS GR8
I'm sorry I keep drunk texting your boyfriend sports updates.
That's okay. He needs friends too.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
