we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
