You think the Elephant Man ever tried to pick up chicks claiming all his appendages were elephant-sized?
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
in the event i get tipsy, my nipples are your responsibility
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
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