I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
I was at that stage of drunk where it seemed appropriate to just make out with everyone. As like a greeting.
I hear you
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
i am laugh crying so hard the guy next door stopped playing guitar
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I feel like too many of my sentences start of with "Hey, fuckface!"
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize
