i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
It's like the bermuda triangle of cat puke
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
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