I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
If it makes you feel any better, i gave her boyfriend a blowjob last week.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
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