It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
and while your girlfriend wears your relationship pants, i'll be wearing my ecstasy pants
I just came up with the perfect plan. Once i'm a dentist i'm going to offer dad a million dollars to divorce mom.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
My nonexistent future grandchildren will one day ask me when I knew I'd lost control of my life. And now I know.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
Do you remember whose house we're in?
The man who almost made us Eskimo sisters is getting married. Of course I'll be your date. We need to toast the end of his sex life!
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
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