Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Just used your umbrella as a puke sheild. Thanks man.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
It is. We should just be drunk all the time forever everything is like just 90% more perfect
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Does buying my brother condoms for Christmas say "keep having sex with her, I like her" or "dear god, do not get this girl pregnant"?
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
So I had sex in the woods today. Anything else that happened today? Irrelevant. It was a GOOD day.
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
The drag queen you used to date and the girl you brought over last night are discussing your sex noises in my living room. I'm changing my locks.
He finished and he wasn't even totally hard. He actually came without a boner.
HOW IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE.
Randomize
