when we woke up the fish was dead lying next to us on the bed. wat should i tell her
he got a rim job in the basement.
apparently i was the one who gave it to him.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
I actually had to tell him that sex doesn't replace my Tupperware. Our relationship has reached a weird level.
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
I've been on the cocaine and semen diet for the last 24 hours, lunch sounds great.
Randomize
