i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
So my teacher figured out I made a drinking game out of her lecture. Once my drink was gone she let us out. Happy St. Patricks day class. Your welcome
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
well let's see. after you forcefully shoved a half-eaten apple in my mouth, you ruined the pepsi by dumping an entire beer in there.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
I was so fucked up last night that I peed on his FATHER'S BED and fell asleep there. and yes. his father was asleep in the bed
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
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