we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
he tried to catch his projectile vomit...then went back to beer pong
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
Hahah fuuuck, bag pipers played around me while I threw up. Literally
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
PICK ME UP NOW I THINK THIS MOTEL IS A CRIME SCENE. also congrats on your engagement i saw the post on my phone while i was climbing out the window
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
