The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
He literally lured me in the house with his cat then we ended up fucking on the living room couch while the cat just sat there and watched
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
