Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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