we're blogging at a bar
I showed him my bush... on skype.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Ok see being that I'm not present or participating your vague texts "neeeeed that" and "vagina" leave a lot to question.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Randomize
