like i told you yesterday: virgins, blood, my name. do it.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
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