people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
I had sex on an exercise ball. The inevitable has occurred.
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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