She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
Thanks for DJing my sex last night. You were on point 💜
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
