I understand how i shit in my shoes, but explain why you were wearing them.
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Need sex. Gaining weight.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I'm sorry but I require more work than your hamster. I need food, a minimum of 5 pillows, and I need to be played with daily.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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