jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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