Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
fat people need to stop using the handicapped bathroom stall so I can have sex in it. it's common logic
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I'm not sure if I should pay him or he should pay me, but someone should get paid for the sex I had this morning.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
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