I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I genuinely attribute some of my blowjob skills to playing saxophone in highschool
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
