Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
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