Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
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