I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Uess honpr I rememebrt hEzS cuter
You'll have to translate that into sober in the morning.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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