so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Just because I stayed up all night betting on Australian Horse Racing doesn't mean I have a gambling program.
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
I think my pickup truck has been used for the sex... This doesn't sit right with me.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Randomize
