puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
If i come home from court on friday.. i'm definitely doing something illegal.
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Pregnancy scare over. Let the cockfest begin.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Confirm that you received these messages so that I know you feel the agony of my vagina. There is such a thing as "too many penises".
I AM VODKA MAN
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
Randomize
