For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
We were eating hotdog buns dipped in French onion dip in lawn chairs at 4am. That drunk
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
i made sure not to drool on your bed by putting my hoodie on backwards and swaddling my face in the hood
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Btw. I have a sinus infection from doing cocaine in a portapotty at a Duran Duran concert. So, gimme a couple of days before y'all start the party.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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