Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
I'm trying to figure if this dude sitting in his car with the door open is dead or just sleeping. Someone was probably wondering the same thing bout me 20 minutes ago. Your meeting is taking a ridiculous amount of time.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
Randomize
