Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
I just chased the everclear with Listerine...I think I found my new chaser!
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
This is why I love being gay. I could never afford that much birth control.
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
