I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Who would have guessed that her hair would be so flammable
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
my poor anus
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Randomize