one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
biggest mistake ever: halloween 2009
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Dicks are so weird. He has kind of a feminine comforter in the background.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
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