i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
there were at least 5 of us standing around the bathroom stall cheering you on to throw up.
Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Still no second date. Guess you shouldn't show guys your taser on the first date.
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
Randomize
